Shark Makes Baby Without Sex
Last Updated (Monday, 29 November 1999 19:00) Written by Administrator Monday, 13 October 2008 10:05
Ok, I admin, I have no idea have sharks have sex. But I know they do. Because thats how animals work. But nooooo. Not anymore. A Shark in the Ohio Zoo managed to have a baby withough doing the nasty. This is a bad bad thing. First of all, how do we know this isnt the coming of the Shark Messiah who will lead his shark people out of slavery? If so, there's not a whole lot we can do but sit back and wait for the shark uprising (which I've been predicting for the past 5 years). Or what if this means that sharks can just have kids whenever they want? Scientists are already studing it to see how, and knowing scientists, they'll try to figure out how to get people to do the same thing. And you know what that means...women will have no reason to lets guys like me 'get any'. Thats a bad thing.
"It is possible that parthenogenesis could become more common in these sharks if population densities become so low that females have trouble finding mates," said Mahmood Shivji a scientist studying the shark baby. Translated, that means if the lady doesn't she anything she likes, she justs does it alone.
LHC Shut Down
Last Updated (Monday, 29 November 1999 19:00) Written by Administrator Saturday, 27 September 2008 17:26
I hate to say 'I told you so'...actually, I love saying 'I told you so', thats the whole purpose of BSP. So here goes.
I TOLD YOU SO!
The Large Hadron Collider has been shut down by the mad scientists that built it. A week into being turned on, it started leaking helium which caused an emergency shut down to protect the earth. One of the big wigs with the project, Peter Limon said "Events occur from time to time that temporarily stop operations, for shorter or longer periods, especially during the early phases.." Which is smarty talk for 'PHEW!'.
The LHC is scheduled to get turned back on in the spring of 2009. Maybe.
Bears Survive in Space Naked
Last Updated (Monday, 29 November 1999 19:00) Written by Administrator Friday, 12 September 2008 12:00
Some space agency in Europe decided to find out which animals could survive in space without space suits. I guess so that we can know before hand which animals we can use as cannon fodder in the upcoming space wars. It seems that there are actually tiny animals called water bears that can float around in space without dying.
LHC Didnt Destroy the Earth...Yet
Last Updated (Monday, 29 November 1999 19:00) Written by Administrator Thursday, 11 September 2008 07:41
You know all those comic books where the villian creates a machine that will blow up the world? Well, while Batman was off making a billion dollars in theatres, Dr. AtomSmasher actually went ahead and built one. The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) went online yesterday (9-10-09) and proceeded to do whatever its supposed to do. Something about taking an atom, accellerating to the the speed of light , and smashing it up against a wall so it can see what will happen. Oh, and theres a small chance it'll create a black hole that will suck the planet into oblivion. Sleep tight.
The BSP Strikes Back
Last Updated (Wednesday, 10 September 2008 11:08) Written by Administrator Wednesday, 10 September 2008 11:03
Hey Look! Bad Science Projects has come bad to life like a frozen prehistoric bacteria thawed out in a lab. If you're unaware, BSP is here to chronicle all of the times scientists do something that they really should've thought better of. We all know its only a matter of time before computers rise up and enslave us all because we were too busy battling mutant rabbits that escaped after being created in a vat. So why rush it?
